Last week, Step Up Leader Tip borrowed a Leading Blog post on a topic that is fundamental to effective leadership and living: presence. How many times do we notice that we are physically here but our mind is somewhere else? This is a symptom of the inability to be present, without which connection with another person can’t happen.
To see our exploration of the “5 Gears” models’ first two gears, see Part 1: Is Your Leadership In The Right Gear? Part 1.
The Remaining Three Gears
3rd Gear: Why Being Social Matters
3rd Gear is the social gear. 3rd gear is a mindset. It is the space between task-driven, hyper focused work and the no-work, relational connection of being with your family, spouse, or close friend. Type-As need to remember that business happens in 3rd gear-in relationships. If you are too important for small talk, you might want to study the chapter on 3rd Gear. Of course you can get stuck in 3rd gear and overdo it. At the same time if you try to control social space it actually becomes a 4th Gear activity for you.
2nd Gear: Connecting Deeply
2nd Gear represents connecting with family, friends, or colleagues. Whether work colleagues, family, or friends, it is time geared toward relationship building without an agenda or pressure to be productive. Some of us have never really learned how to connect. It can’t be forced. It requires making time and learning to truly give of yourself to others.
2nd Gear is a difficult gear to be in because we live in a 4th Gear world. Kubicek writes that while writing this book consumed a lot of time, energy and mental thought, “it is still my responsibility to be the leader worth following in my home. Even with the pressure of a deadline, I still have to practice shifting.” He has found that being present in 2nd Gear leads to healthy relationships that bring peace to your mind and heart, fruitful growth between people, better conversations, likeability and trust, reestablished priorities, less drama and more security, social awareness and emotional intelligence.
1st Gear: Learn How To Recharge
1st Gear represents being fully recharged. Do you know how to recharge? “If you figure out what 1st Gear feels like for you and discipline yourself to spend more time there, more power will flow through you. If you live and lead out of 20 percent battery life then you will never experience what you hope to experience.” The recharging gear if different for all of us. What works for one may not work for another. But we need to find what works for us. Think about this statement: “Working from your rest, not rest from your work, is the goal.” Note to self: “Crashing is not resting; it is actually just crashing.” It is simply stalling out. Truly healthy rest restores you.[/well]
A Bonus Gear
Reverse: Learn How to Apologize
Reverse is the responsive gear. It is used when we need to back up and start again or apologize. Too many people operate without a reverse gear.
There are two types of people-responsive and resistant. You hire responsive ones and fire the resistant. Responsive people are self-aware and have a consciousness that is not steeped in victim mentality, but rather responsibility. They understand that they are responsible for their actions and will make amends when they have clearly overstepped their bounds. Responsive people are the best employees, and spouses, and children.
Resistant people, on the other hand, are exhausting. Resistance is basically pride. Resistance will fight rather than resolve, blame rather than admit, and run away rather than run toward reconciliation.
Are there any relationships you need to restore? [/well]
Making the 5 Gears Work For You
[notification type=”alert-success” close=”false”]
- Where do we like to spend most of our time ?
- What gear is the hardest for us to be in?
- What’s the right gear for waking up?
- What’s the right gear for connecting?
- How can you practice shifting?[/notification]
We need all 5 gears to function and live effectively. The Step Up Leader system helps you develop this capacity in an effective and sustainable way, helping you create ease along the way. To learn more about our approach, download my free audio, “5 Secrets Every Leader Should Know.”
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